On power dynamics, fairness and giving with the right spirit

My background is very working class. I grew up in public housing and my family didn’t have any real financial wealth at all. I always had a real heart for social justice. At school, I would always be first to put up my hand to help other people. I would harass my mum to make things to sell for causes we were raising money for; people living in poverty, anything like that. Even though I was aware we didn't have a lot of money, I never felt impoverished, never felt poor. I just knew we didn't have spare money. But I didn't know anyone else who did either. The idea that people have enough money to give some away was not a concept I was aware of until much later in life, so instead, I would donate my time. From a very young age, like six or seven, I was actively involved in promoting the idea of looking after people who needed support. I also grew up in a family that lived quite collectively which was pretty joyous. I was always taught, if you've got something and someone else doesn't, then you give it to them. I recall one instance when my parents had saved hard for something we needed. But then someone in the family had more critical needs and my parents just gave them the savings they had, without any sense that was a sacrifice. That is just what you do. My Dad taught me to only give away what you can afford not to get back because you never want to be in a situation where a relationship is damaged over money. I still live by that now.

It’s always been the same things: fairness, social justice, the idea of looking after supporting others, as part of being in a community, as part of a healthy society. Except now I'm aware of my privilege, relatively speaking. My life circle is much wider so I'm aware of how much wealth is out there. I don't feel like I am ever going to have the sort of money that enables me to establish myself as a philanthropist, but I do know that I'm in a fortunate position, so I find ways to give that I think are meaningful. I also believe every part of giving matters. Whether it's financial, whether it's your time, whether it's just being responsible enough to be aware of what the needs are out there. Connecting to something that is important to you and seeking to have a reciprocal relationship. I don't want to just give money to a cause. I want to understand it. I want to feel like I have a relationship in some way - that doesn't mean being involved in the work but it means having a connection.

One of the ways I give is to donate my sitting fees from one board straight into a different organisation that supports women who have experienced domestic violence through state-based services and national advocacy. This is a bit unusual as there is often an expectation that you would donate sitting fees back to the organisation paying them. But particularly in this terrible time in our history when we are so much more aware of the amount of violence towards women and girls. To me, that's a no-brainer. But it’s also an issue close to me through many people I care about. And if those sitting fees never hit my bank account, I’m not losing anything, I’m just redirecting the funds elsewhere. It’s a modest gesture but I hope it helps.

Because I knew that they had lost valuable government funding and that would detrimentally impact the voices and participation of Indigenous women on the issue of domestic violence. I wanted to do something to help because of how much I've been exposed to the impact of domestic violence on women and girls and how important it is that we support people and listen to what they need. Because of those experiences, that long history of knowledge about the impact of violence and the way it impacts a whole person's being as something that they carry throughout their life, often as parents. This is where I want my giving to go. Also, even though it’s a modest amount, it is enough to have an impact.

What has been emphasised to me is how important it is to be giving with the right spirit for it to be a successful experience. To me that means having really clear expectations about the exchange. Being clear that it doesn't entitle me to anything; and if I want something from the relationship, it's up to me to be clear about that at the start. I've been involved in a lot of fundraising and, particularly where people are giving to Indigenous communities, deep down there's a hope that they will learn more about Indigenous cultures and build relationships to gain greater insight. Quite often that doesn't land. Many Indigenous organisations feel pressure to demonstrate our ability to manage money to Western governance standards. So often, when engaging with a funder, you can be quite focused on reassuring them that you’re doing the right things with their money. A lot of that cultural exchange doesn't occur organically, which doesn’t come to light as an issue until the relationship is finalised and there is time for reflection. People are more aware now, more upfront, but I still think so much energy goes into making sure transactions happen legally, financially and from a governance framework and it is those conversations that get prioritised.

Be very clear about why you're choosing that organisation. Motivation is critical and doing some self-exploration around what you would like to happen as a result of the relationship is important. I would also urge funders to consider how they can help set up a relationship of equals where the money in the relationship is not the arbiter of power. That is one of the key challenges in the society we are part of and the way that money is exchanged and seen to be demonstrative of power, entitlement and privilege. All those things are true, but they can be less true based on the relationship you agree to enter into. Making it a priority to think about what characteristics you would like the relationship to have, and being able to articulate that, is often something people are really challenged by. 

To me it demonstrated a massive maturity and real depth of improved understanding about Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples and communities and our place in the country compared to when I was first involved with philanthropy 25 years ago. We were extremely fortunate to have the support of so many companies and philanthropists but also support from individuals who might have given just $10 or $20. Those people in our country who wanted to be actively engaged in this incredibly important nation building moment and who were personally committed. I also think about all those volunteers who may not have given money but gave hours and hours of their time. It shows that where there is community will and spirit, and when you harness it collectively, you can do so much. And even though we were unsuccessful in the task, ultimately we now know some things about our country that we couldn't have said with any real clarity before.

We know there are at least six million people who cared enough to vote yes and wanted to support this really ambitious project in the face of stark opposition. Knowing that is important to a lot of people. I was on the ABC’s election coverage panel when Antony Green called it a lost referendum. It was not one of my easiest moments in life but whatever I managed to say in that moment, I’m still getting feedback from people who were encouraged by my reflections. Anything I said was a reflection of the generosity we experienced in the campaign.  The spirit of generosity experienced across the campaign, by people all around the country, who wanted us to be our best selves as a nation – they are the kind of stories I will remember as I still struggle to understand the lack of support by the majority. I will never forget or be confused by the amount of generosity, vigour and determination of so many people who wanted to see us get this done. It is extraordinary to know that the support is there.

I don't have a plan in mind but I know it's important. I’m only in the position that I’m in because of the people who gave what they had, before me. To me, it's about being aware of the ongoing responsibility to give and participate in experiences and opportunities to ensure that others benefit, not as recipients of charity, but as empowered people who can then pass on that generosity when they are in a position to do so. I feel like that's the circle of life. That's how it is meant to be. I think about the people who've been incredibly generous towards me, and not just through funding organisations that have helped me develop, but also the extraordinary people who've invested in building my skills and capability through mentoring and just being supportive over decades and decades. I wouldn't be here without all of those people collectively. I see all of that as giving. But again, I never want money to be the arbiter of power. I feel like there's a communal responsibility to give where we can, in whatever way we can. I'm really driven by that. If I was to try to put a dollar figure on my volunteer hours and contributions it would run into a huge amount of money. The same goes for so many other Indigenous people. I hope that I have been able to add value through that effort as well as the financial giving I've been able to contribute.